Every time I hear the words “domestic violence,” I immediately think or say, “Run for your life.”
Every 9 seconds, a woman is assaulted in the United States, and 1 in 3 women have experienced rape, physical violence and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime, with nearly 10 million people subjected to domestic violence each year. Globally, over a quarter of women in relationships have experienced some form of violence from an intimate partner.
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. The “Remember My Name” Domestic Violence Vigil is Wednesday, Oct. 8, from 5:30 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. on the steps of the Judge E. Maurice Braswell Cumberland County Courthouse in downtown Fayetteville.
“We have been doing this event for as long as I can remember, and Judge Beth Keever started it,” said Deborah Cashwell, victims’ witness coordinator for the Cumberland County Sheriff’s Office and community partner of the Domestic Violence Vigil. “We always have it in October because it is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and we raise awareness about domestic violence and try to get the community involved.”
The solemn event features keynote speaker Michelle McKenney. She is a veteran, therapist, entrepreneur, speaker and author.
“We are happy that she is sharing her experiences with domestic violence, and I am sure it will be heartfelt,” said Cashwell.
Amy White, from the Cumberland County CARE Center, is the Mistress of Ceremony. Chief District Court Judge Toni King will give the opening remarks. Cumberland County Commissioner Chairman Kirk deViere will deliver remarks. Cumberland County Commissioner Glenn Adams will facilitate the balloon release. “We have released doves in the past, but this year we will release balloons to remember the lives that were lost from domestic violence,” said Cashwell.
The 82nd Airborne Division’s All-American Chorus will perform. Representatives from Fort Bragg will be in attendance. Retired Chief District Court Judge Beth Keever will read the names of the victims who have died during the past year in North Carolina due to domestic violence. LED candles will be lit in remembrance of each victim.
“This year, there are not that many victims who lost their lives to domestic violence compared to last year,” said Cashwell. “Those names will be listed in the program, and we will say their names.”
She added, “We will ring a bell for the victims in Cumberland County when their name is called.”
According to the North Carolina Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCCADV) website, from Jan. 1, 2025, to Sept.10, 2025, there have been 47 domestic violence murders in North Carolina, which is down from 94 domestic violence murders that took place in 2024. The website tracks deaths that are a result of domestic violence, and the list includes the names of victims killed by their current or former partner, as well as third parties who are killed because of intimate partner death. Intimate partners include same-sex and opposite-sex intimate partners.
Domestic violence not only affects the victims, but it also impacts their families as well. It is very disheartening to have to make funeral arrangements to bury your loved one due to the act of domestic violence. If you are currently in a domestic violence situation, please heed this message. You have got to love yourself enough to leave and/or run for your life. You deserve a life of peace and happiness. You are not alone, and there are resources to assist you. The Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233.
The faithful organizers of the Domestic Violence Vigil include The Cumberland County District Court, the CARE Center for Family Violence Program, Cumberland County Sheriff’s Office, Fayetteville Police Department, Hope Mills Police Department, Army Community Services, Legal Aid of North Carolina and the Phoenix Center.
Information tables will be set up to talk to individuals who have questions and to share resources for domestic violence, such as how to do a safety plan, how to obtain a protection order, how to get out of a domestic violence situation, and more.
“Bringing these resources to let people know what is out there might get somebody thinking and say that they can go to the CARE Center or the shelter,” said Cashwell. “This is their first step of getting out of that domestic violence situation.”
Cashwell added, “There are definitely ways to do it safely because everyone’s situation is different.”
Cashwell’s goal for the event is to garner community support for domestic violence.
“This is more than just a ceremony, this is a call to action for reminding us how deeply domestic violence affects individuals, their families and the community,” said Cashwell. “I would like to see people become more aware of domestic violence, volunteer with some of these community partners, support one another and come up with some solutions.”
Please wear purple to the event. All attendees will receive a goody bag, and there will be a raffle for three gift baskets. The courthouse is located at 117 Dick Street. For more information, call 910-475-3222 or email Sanya Eller, court manager, at Sanya.T.Eller@nccourts.org.