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  •     The Fayetteville Symphony Orchestra has spent much of the past year introducing Fayetteville residents to symphony music, now it is with much excitement that the symphony announces its 2008-2009 Subscription Series Season: A Tour Around the World. 
         “My vision for this upcoming season is to provide a variety of concerts at various venues in Fayetteville,” said Fouad Fakhouri, music director and conductor of the Fayetteville Symphony Orchestra. “We have a number of soloists who will bring excitement and variety to our season.”
        Fakhouri added that the past season was a huge success and attendance was up and continues to grow steadily.  
    The tour begins in France with Fantastic French Favorites on Saturday, Oct. 25 at 8 p.m., at Methodist University’s Reeves Auditorium. French soloist Marylene Dosse will perform Beethoven’s Piano Concerto No. 1 followed by a performance of the French masterpiece Symphonie Fantastique composed by Hector Berlioz. 
        On Saturday, Dec. 13 at 7:30 p.m., Holiday Celebration will be featured at Berean Baptist Church. The FSO will perform popular holiday favorites along with the 2007-2008 Harlan Duenow Young Artists Concerto Competition Winner; Dominic Mercurio, performing Capriccio Brilliant for piano and orchestra; the traditional Christmas Sing-a-Long; and Leroy Anderson’s holiday favorite Sleigh Ride. 
        Copland, Mozart and Dvorak will be featured on Saturday, Feb. 21 at 8 p.m., at Fayetteville State University’s Seabrook Auditorium. The audience will enjoy sounds of America, Bohemia and Austria, including Mozart’s First Flute Concerto performed by International flute soloist Ines Abdel Daim, Aaron Copland’s masterpiece Lincoln Portrait and Dvorak’s Symphony No. 8 will also be performed.  
        The season will conclude with Russian Favorites on Saturday, May 2 at 8 p.m., at Methodist University’s Reeves Auditorium. The concert features works by two of the most influential Russian composers: Stravinsky’s The Firebird Suite and Shostakovich’s Fifth Symphony.               
         “We will continue the programs that we started last season and in the process of evaluating them,” said Fakhouri. “We will continue to put on the programs that have been successful.” 
    The programs include children’s educational programs, third grade concerts, library series and the Harlan Duenow Young Artists Competition.  {mosimage}
        “We are excited about this new season and hope to attract new audiences,” said a hopeful Fakhouri.
    You can save at least 10 percent over single adult ‘08-‘09 ticket prices. Seniors, military and students save even more. Tickets for the entire season can be mailed so there is no waiting in line. Get an additional $5 discount per season ticket if purchased by Aug. 1.
        One season ticket gains entry to all four season concerts. For more information call 433-4690.
  •     “Death from above” has never carried such cheerful connotations.
        On Saturday, Aug. 9, the Airborne & Special Operations Museum will honor the folks who made that slogan a part of the American vernacular when the facility celebrates National Airborne Day, commemorating the 68th anniversary of the Army Parachute Test Platoon’s first official jump and the eighth anniversary of the museum.
        The event kicks off at the museum starting at 8:30 a.m., the 82nd Airborne Division Band plays at 9 a.m., followed by freefall parachute demonstrations by the U.S. Army Special Operations Command Black Daggers, the 82nd Airborne Division All-American Freefall Team and the U.S. Army Parachute Team, otherwise known as the Golden Knights. Also, the 82nd Airborne Division Chorus will perform and there will be a platoon of soldiers demonstrating the use of their weapons. In addition, there will be an artillery field piece and some military vehicles on display, as well as riggers demonstrating the packing of parachutes. {mosimage}
        The planned keynote speaker for the ceremony is LTG Robert W. Wagner, commander, U.S. Army Special Operations Command.
        While the actual anniversary of the Army Parachute Test Platoon’s first jump is Aug. 16, Dr. John Duvall, director of the ASOM, said the museum has always celebrated National Airborne Day on a Saturday.
        “The 16th often falls in the middle of the week which isn’t convenient for most people, so we hold it on a Saturday,” said Duvall. “This year, the 16th actually falls on a Saturday, but the 82nd Airborne Association has its annual convention that weekend, so they are out of town.”
        Duvall added slyly that “there is no such thing as National Airborne Day” — at least not outside of Fayetteville.
    “That’s something that has to be approved by Congress,” said Duvall.
        Duvall says the paratroopers will land in a circle on the grounds of the museum, a sometimes tricky feat.
        “It’s a hairy business. … They have to clear it with the FAA because we’re in the flight path for the airport,” said Duvall. “And when the jumpers get level with Haymont Hill it affects the wind, as does the building itself. So we’ve had some interesting events where a paratrooper came down in the parking lot and one over on the other side of the railway station.”
        Other highlights of National Airborne Day include the selection of a soldier of the year from the 82nd Airborne, and the laying of black roses — the symbol of a fallen soldier — at the foot of monuments in front of the museum; the monuments include one dedicated to the members of the original Test Platoon and another to the members of the first black soldiers who went through jump school in 1943-1944.
        Even though the history of parachuting dates back to 1797 when Frenchman Andre-Jacques Garnerin jumped from a balloon at an altitude of 3,000 feet and employed a chute of his own design, the United States military was slow to recognize the strategic benefits of the device.
        Toward the end of  World War I, Brig. Gen. Billy Mitchell of the Army — an early true believer in the effectiveness of airpower — received approval to include a parachute drop of the 1st Division at Metz behind German lines; however, the war ended before the then revolutionary idea could be attempted, delaying the implementation of paratroopers in the United States for more than 20 years.
        Other nations, most notably Germany and the Soviet Union, began training paratroopers in the 1930s. In early 1940, Gen. George C. Marshall, chief of staff, told Maj. Gen. George Lynch, chief of Infantry, to push into development an “air infantry.”
        North Carolinian Maj. William Lee, known as the “Father of the Airborne,” was tabbed as the project officer, forming a test platoon at Fort Benning, Ga. On April, 1940, the German army’s effectiveness in utilizing paratroopers as it invaded the Netherlands lit a fire under this nation’s military powers that be and the paratrooper program was pushed into overdrive.
        “The Germans used them brilliantly, seizing some bridges in Holland in an almost special operations role,” said Duvall. {mosimage}
        The 501st Parachute Battalion was activated on Oct. 1, 1940, and, along with the 82nd Airborne, played a vital role in World War II, especially in the American invasion at Normandy on D-Day.
        The paratrooper training program was relocated to Fort Bragg in 1946, but not without some protest.
        “Bragg was an artillery base at that time,” said Duvall. “They didn’t want the paratroopers.”
        Despite those early protestations, the 82nd Airborne has become a symbol of Fort Bragg as well as a symbol of Fayetteville – a symbol that ties the military and the town’s citizens together.
        “National Airborne Day has proven to be very popular, usually attracting a couple of thousand people,” said Duvall, who added that the museum sees about 140,000 visitors a year.
        “So it’s always a pretty special day.”
  •     I have been a student of the land for the last 20 years and I have learned a very special secret. We speak to the future generations through the land as our forbearers whisper hints of their lives to us from the land. It is not our children, it is the land that is the link to our past and to our future.
        There is a small family cemetery on the farm — deep in the woods and marked by great red cedar trees that were traditionally planted at each headstone. The five small stones are records of a family that worked the longleaf pines from 1801 to 1900. An old map marks the site on Big Island that was the first change of horses on the Fayetteville-Wilmington stagecoach run.
        One of the last East Coast panthers roams the woods with the bear, wild turkey, quail and snakes. But it is the land that I love most — the coastal Bermuda fields where the goats browsed, the great cypress trees down in the lower swamp and that vast six-mile long field full of corn and soybeans that can be seen from the unbroken view at the upper end — it still takes my breath away. My husband, Steve, and I grew a million turkeys a year on the land and the day he died I had 1,000 Boer goats. {mosimage}
        On Aug. 8, at 10:08 a.m., I will forever surrender the farm back to the wetlands. I would not be truthful if I did not confess to a little sadness. But the land has been good to us over the years and deserves a rest and a return to its natural state. It is not the death of a farm but the “resurrection of the wetlands.” The climate is changing, population pressure is growing and the American way of life is facing challenges. We are going to have to rethink our large, fuel consuming farms and the way we use and store precious water; the role of the wetlands in filtration, clean air and energy; the need to adapt crops to changing environments to assure our food supply and the connections between human survival and the earth.
        I think it was Thomas Friedman who observed that “if we are the deluge, we are also the ark.”
    The North Carolina Farm Center for Innovation and Sustainability will also be born on Aug. 8. The vision for the center is to become an “incubator” in the purest sense of the word. Guided by a group of wise and talented advisors, “green entrepreneurs” will have a place to practice or plant an idea. Innovative “wizards” will have the opportunity to provide their bio-based technologies to landowners who in turn can put it into service. Perhaps a “green engine” can be sparked that will drive the future jobs that will grow from the ecosystems. And two years from now, once one million trees have been planted, the plan is to build a 100 percent off the grid sustainable “lodge” that will host community conversations, encourage think tank meetings and strive to forge our link to future generations of both mankind and the wildlife.
        Over the past seven years I owe a debt of gratitude to so many of you who knowingly or unknowingly gave me a lot of “buck-up and get on with it” support.  And when the temptation to “just sell the place” would come back I would remember the epithet I placed on Steve’s stone:
        “Man is temporary, the land is forever.”
        So, on Aug. 8, we are going to “stand this project up” and we invite you to celebrate it with us.
  •     I surprised myself not long ago when I realized I was mentally organizing my day to be as gasoline-efficient as I could possibly be. {mosimage}
        That meant thinking deliberately about what I had to do that day and structuring my schedule so that meetings and errands took place in the same part of town and that I did as much as I could in as short a time as possible and in as compact an area as possible. If it was not something I absolutely had to do that very day, I did not do it.
    I think millions of Americans are thinking exactly the same way.
        The last time gasoline was hard to come by and dear as well was in the 1970s, and I was a single working person living in Raleigh with a very modest paycheck.
        My friends and I ate lots of spaghetti and canned tuna, but we got by. Life went on, of course, and hard times eased. Most of us eventually slipped into laxer habits, with vehicles morphing over time into the seemingly steroid-enhanced SUVs we drive today. Times were good in the 1980s and 1990s, and we took to drinking expensive cups of coffee cuddled in fancy insulators that would have shocked my parents who were perfectly satisfied with the grocery store brand in a kitchen mug. Magazines told us all about designer everything, and even though most of us could not afford such luxuries, we looked anyway and perhaps wished we could or we bought knock-offs manufactured in foreign countries under who-knows-what conditions. Vacations to far-flung corners of the earth became reality for some middle class Americans. The notion of saving for a rainy day slid to the back burner for many of us.
    This time may be different. This may be, as economists say, a true “correction.”
        Analysts say we Americans may be learning a real lesson in personal economics, not unlike the one our parents and grandparents learned during the Great Depression. Many Americans have watched with growing dismay and feelings of helplessness as our expenses have risen relentlessly and our resources, such as the values of our homes, have shrunk.
        Here are a few statistics to illustrate how we are reacting to what is happening:
    Nielsen, a market research firm, reported earlier this month that almost two-thirds of us are cutting spending because of rising prices of gasoline, dairy products and other consumable goods we use often. That is an 18 percent increase from one year ago. Almost 80 percent of us are doing exactly what I find myself doing — organizing our daily schedules to be economical and efficient, and more than half of us are eating out less frequently. The International Council of Shopping Centers reports that sales at various discount operations and wholesalers are rising while sales at traditional retailers are dropping. Likewise, grocery stores report that sales of their house brands are up by more than 9 percent, and sales of branded products have risen by less than half that percentage.
    Vehicle sales tell a similar story.
        Large trucks and SUVs are being heavily discounted, with sales remaining grim. Toyota plans to shut down production of such large gas guzzlers. What vehicle sales that are taking place revolve around smaller, more economical models, and once again there are waiting lists for hybrids.
        The National Bicycle Dealers’ Association reports increased sales, though not of recreational bikes. They are selling traditional utility bikes and offering refresher training for folks who may not have ridden a bike in years.
        The question in everyone’s mind now is how long these changes in American buying habits are going to last. Are we Americans merely reacting to a challenging economy or are we truly changing our habits as consumers?
        Whether we all continue shopping at wholesalers and discounters and foregoing our cherished lattes is an open question, but my own take is that the changes associated with petroleum products and all they go into are permanent.
    I do not expect in my lifetime to see gasoline prices come back to where they were at the beginning of this decade, and even if by some miracle they do, we now understand that we must conserve our oil resources. Never again can we take any energy resource for granted — they are commodities, finite and precious ones. The American age of consumable and disposable everything ended in 2008.
        Analysts may debate the lessons of the current American economy for years, but one does stand out to me. We are learning that the great economic forces which surround us and which buffet the world from time to time are out of our individual control. What is within our control, however, is how we react to them. If what we are learning is to economize, conserve and save within our own little spheres, then we may well be returning to traditional American virtues of thrift, saving and planning for whatever lies ahead.
    That, to me, is not a bad lesson for us and for our children.
  •     In the coming weeks, much will be written and said about the Fayetteville Museum of Art and its relocation to Festival Park. The Fayetteville City Council will again weigh in on the subject during an upcoming work session, and only this past week, a group was formed to oppose the construction of the facility.
    We do not doubt that the construction of the new, modern facility will be a great addition to our community. Its presence  will only add more legitimacy to our city’s thriving, vital arts community. This is something that everyone on both sides of this discussion can agree on. What is at contention is whether the FMoA will contribute to Festival Park or detract from it. Those who think the FMoA building will detract from the park have been upfront and vocal about their concerns. They have written opinion pieces in the daily and community newspapers, blogged themselves blue and even handed out flyers in opposition to the construction during the recent Fourth Friday event. At least they are engaging our community in the discussion. They are making people aware of their concerns and they are inviting feedback.
        The question begs to be asked: Where is the FMoA and what is it doing to engage the community and build support for this important project?
        From where we sit, there appears to be a bit of arrogance in Dr. Menno Pennick’s response to the opposition — an attitude that seems to carry over throughout the organization. The museum’s board of directors may believe that since they have the rights and a deed to the land, this makes the construction of the facility a “done deal” that does not merit any further discussion. This would be fine if discussion were not already occurring, and if a groundswell of opposition to the plan was not growing. But since it is, it must be met head on.
        If the FMoA board is committed to this location then they are going to have to come out from behind their wrought iron gates and engage the community. This includes their detractors. The FMoA has made few attempts to do that. At the last Fayetteville After Five, they put a skeleton frame up to represent the footprint of the new museum building in the park. It was a good idea, but unfortunately, the frame did not extend to the parking spaces that will need to be built within the park — leaving its detractors fresh ammunition.
        Some board members have also penned articles in support of the museum, but they shy away from speaking directly to the community or making themselves accessible to listen to local residents about the situation. As recently as this past week’s Fourth Friday event, the opposition to the FMoA facility was on the streets engaging the community. Again, where was the FMoA?
        Maybe the FMoA doesn’t know how to wage this battle, or at least that’s the impression we get. Two weeks ago Up & Coming Weekly Publisher Bill Bowman offered Dr. Pennick space to write an editorial that could tell the museum’s story. That invitation was rebuffed. It seems that the museum doesn’t seem to realize who their friends are, or worse, still doesn’t care about making new ones.
        If the FMoA wants to truly become a part of the downtown arts community, then they need to be present now. The FMoA isolation is not strictly due to its geographic location behind Eutaw Shopping Center — it comes from a closed mindset that looks only at itself for itself and never at the community as a whole.
        For the FMoA to be successful (keep in mind, the board has to raise $15 million to build the museum) it has to engage the community. It has to become better at telling its story. And that, like the construction of the facility and raising the money is not going to be easy. They better get started and soon.
  •     I’ve been an out lesbian for several years and am only attracted to women. A close male friend recently confessed his feelings for me. I’ve known him for years, and we connect in a way I’ve never connected with anybody. If he were a woman, I’d consider him my soul mate. If only I could somehow make myself bisexual. I love him, but have no desire for mutual pants-less-ness. In fact, the idea of sleeping with him grosses me out. Does no sex have to mean no relationship? Lots of hetero women have low sex drives, and lots are married! Should I give a relationship a try, but mandate that pants must be worn at all times?
    —Dream Or Disaster Waiting To Happen?


        It seems you’re a lesbian, not a “lesbian” who takes vacations — hopping the ferry from the Isle of Lesbos to the mainland for the occasional hetero holiday. But, hey, why let that stop you from getting into a relationship with a straight guy? After all, as you point out, lots of hetero women have low sex drives, and lots of them are married (ideally, to men who also have low sex drives). The question is, do YOU have a low sex drive? Or, better yet, a nonexistent one? Does he? If not, you can announce that there will be none of that “mutual pants-less-ness,” and he could be nodding like a bobblehead, but consciously or subconsciously, he’ll be thinking, “Nah, I’ll get there. Just a matter of time.” It isn’t a malevolent thing, just how guys are wired.
        So you have “feelings” for the guy; I mean, in addition to finding him sexually repellant. You’ve known him forever, you have this amazing connection...why not add a whole new level to your relationship? No, not sex — bitterness and resentment, after he’s hurt that you won’t just try a little ride or two, and you’re hurt that he just won’t stop trying. But, if only he were a woman! If only you were bi! — as if bisexuals are the garbage dump of sexuality, attracted to anyone, as long as they’re a man or a woman.
        Be this guy’s friend by making him aware of how utterly nuts it would be for you to be his girlfriend. Be kind, but hit hard enough to knock the illusions out of his head: “Nothing personal, but my idea of an intense night in bed with the man I love is a heated political debate yelled between the top bunk and the bottom.”

    Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave, #280, Santa Monica, CA  90405, or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com)
    (c)2008, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved.
  • Bomb’s Away
        After languishing for two years in the Irish legislature, the Nuclear Test Ban Bill of 2006 has recently been rethought and refurbished, according to a June report in the Irish Independent. Originally, the bill codified the U.N. Test Ban Treaty, adding some provisions specific to Ireland. Among those additions was the punishment for anyone detonating a nuclear weapon in Ireland: up to 12 months in jail and/or a fine of up to 5,000 euros (then, around $6,500), along with language that might even allow a person found guilty to apply for first-offense probation. The proposed punishment this time is expected to be considerably harsher.

    Can’t Possibly Be True
        In the 1920s, when inmate “chain gangs” were in their heyday, Alabama sheriffs were allotted a prison meal budget of $1.75 per prisoner per day, with thrifty sheriffs allowed to pocket any excess for themselves. According to a May Associated Press investigation, the policy, and the amount, are unchanged to this day in 55 of the state’s 67 counties, and also unchanged is the fact that sheriffs have cut the menus so cleverly or drastically that some sheriffs still make money on the deal. (The per-meal fee under the National School Lunch program for low-income students is $2.47.)
        Mr. Gokhan Mutlu filed a lawsuit in May against JetBlue Airways for more than $2 million after he was ordered out of his seat by the captain during a full New York-to-California flight and told to stand up or go “hang out in the bathroom” for the duration. Mutlu had only a gift ticket, and an off-duty JetBlue employee who had originally agreed to sit in the cockpit jump seat changed her mind and thus was given Mutlu’s seat. Mutlu pointed out that he was un-seat-belted during turbulence and during the landing.
        Not Exactly Hard Time: In May, St. Catharines, Ontario, judge Stephen Glithero released Wayne Ryczak on 14 months’ jail time already served, as punishment for strangling a prostitute in his trailer home. He claimed self-defense (improbable in such a strangulation), but had pleaded guilty to manslaughter, requesting via his lawyer a two-year sentence.
        Last year, Stephanie Grissom, driving 71 mph in a 55-mph zone, accidentally struck and killed a Howard County, Md., traffic officer when he stepped onto the highway to motion for her to pull over. In May 2008, the case was closed, with Grissom fined $310 and three points on her record.
  •     Someone asked me the other day what is the hardest part about buying a new bike? I had to think of my own experience on this one. I believe it is easier to decide whether or not to have open heart surgery than to decide on which bike is just right for you. The choices these days are almost mind boggling. Do you want a cruiser, street bike, touring bike, or enduro?
        Do you want a bike to ride across the world or just to hang out with your buddies?
        Then there are the colors. I love dark colors, but I want to be seen by the motorvehiclist on the road so I want something bright. Then you have to ask will you look cool enough?{mosimage}
        What about price? My goodness, you can get into a new bike for about $6,000 and quickly be in the $30,000 range. Want a chopper? Hang on to your wallet because the sky’s the limit.
        Believe it or not, none of these things are the hardest part. So what’s the hardest? It’s the wife. Yes, there it is, it’s out in the open. It goes something like this. “Honey, can we stop by the bike store and take a look around.”
        Of course you know in your mind what you want. You’ve thought about it; you’ve dreamed about it; you’ve talked about it to your friends; you’ve searched the Internet and done your homework. You know exactly what you want. You go into the store, you beeline right to the bike you want because you’ve already been there with your buddies. You look around like it is your first time there and then the salesman calls you by name. You look at your wife with your puppy dog eyes and game on.
        From my own experiences, buying a bike is a lot like the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. At first it is denial.
        She wants the whole subject to go away. At this point she is either for it or against it. If she is for it then you will skip the anger and go directly to acceptance. If she is against it, get ready and head immediately to the bargaining stage. Next comes bargaining. This is why you see so many big bikes out there like the Goldwing, Ultra-Glide, and K1200LTs. Even though the other bikes have backrests and other pleasantries for a passenger, it is here that that you will have to compromise in order to avoid some grief.
        So, here are few recommendations to help you get out the door and on the road: Tell your significant other that she can get one too. Tell her that all of your friends will think she is the coolest. Tell her that when she is on the back every ride will be like her own little parade. Oh, and don’t forget to tell her how much money you will be saving on gas and that will free up some of the family budget.
        For the owners of the bike shop it would do you well to recognize who the buyer really is. I’m not saying that the man doesn’t have a say, but let’s face it, if you don’t sell the wife you won’t make the sale.
    So my recommendation to you is: Make the shop lady friendly. Have clean bathrooms, provide her a beverage, a free jacket or helmet with the sale.
        Ask her about what new adventures the bike will take them on. Remind her of all the quality time they will share together because of the bike. This approach is a win/win situation; and if you play your cards right you, will go straight to acceptance and pass over the depression stage. However, blow this part and it is straight to the depression stage and back to bargaining.
        Good luck and game on!
        If there is a topic that you would like to discuss please send your comments and suggestions to motorcycle4fun@aol.com.
  • Wall-E (Rated G)
    Five Stars

        First, the audience is treated to Presto, a cute little Pixar short about a very hungry bunny, reminiscent of classic Tom and Jerry mayhem. Presto is followed by the main course, WALL-E(98 minutes), a nearly dialogue-free addition to the recent glut of movies with an environmental message. This is a primarily visual feast, but the film does not suffer for it. Director Andrew Stanton, who also helmed Finding Nemo, deftly walks the line between a movie with a message and environmental preachiness. 
        The premise of the film is deceptively simple; what if all the humans left Earth, but forget to turn off the last robot before they leave? WALL-E (Waste Allocation Load Lifter Earth class, voiced by Ben Burtt) is the only functioning robot left from the thousands who were assigned to clean up the planet. Much like the little mermaid, WALL-E collects the relics of the human world without fully understanding the purpose of his trinkets. Through close contact with the trash that humans have left behind, WALL-E develops a human personality. He is also tormented by an increasing sense of being alone in the universe. While he has made friends with an unsquishable cockroach, until he meets EVE (Extraterrestrial Vegetarian Evaluator voiced by Elissa Knight) he is incomplete.{mosimage}
        When EVE is called away, he manages to follow her to the starliner Axiom, home to the remnants of the human race. While on board searching for EVE, WALL-E meets Captain McCrea (Jeff Garlin), John (John Ratzenberger) and Mary (Kathy Najimy). Our descendants have grown dependent on robotic chairs, and enjoy such delicacies as the Buy-N-Large Cupcake in a Cup. Years of space travel have weakened the bones and increased the mass of the human population, but they all seem really nice. They are pampered by their robot servants, but not rude. Apart from all the squishy consumption-obsessed humans, however, there are some robots with questionable directives — including AUTOpilot.       
        This is the first Pixar movie to integrate live actors (i.e. Fred Willard) into the film, but I didn’t really care for the effect. It looks fine, but live actors take away from the mood of the film. As expected, the early scenes on Earth display rich artistry, and never have piles of trash been depicted with such sun-kissed wind-ruffled beauty. With the fluid look perfected during Finding Nemo’s ocean scenes, the outer space scenes are unbelievable. When the action moves to the starliner, the animators do a nice job of creating diverse looks for the robot workers. The soundtrack nicely complements the whimsical atmosphere of the film, drawing heavily from extravagant musicals such as Hello, Dolly — a production that influences WALL-E on many levels. Much like Ratatouilleand The Incredibles, this is a truly family film that can be enjoyed by young children as much as adults.   
        Despite its basic enjoyability, there are some caveats. First, the film’s humans are depicted as fairly homogenous, lacking much racial/ethnic diversity. Second, the happy ending seems to come too easily, without any real effort or accountability on the part of the humans (with the minor exception of the captain). Finally, the Peter Gabriel song running over the end credits is really annoying.

  •     {mosimage}South Park’s Trey Parker and Matt Stone have combined last fall’s Imaginationland episodes into an animated feature film filled out with new material. Seen as a whole, South Park Imaginationland (Sunday, 10 p.m., Comedy Central) emerges as a work of cracked grandeur — a work of genius.
        As a satire of this moment in American history, the scenario is nothing short of perfection. Our fourth-grade heroes discover a leprechaun, who has come to warn of a terrorist attack in Imaginationland. This is the place where all the products of human imagination live together, from Zeus to Charlie Brown to Popeye to (brace yourselves, Christians) Jesus. Al Qaeda-style fanatics want to destroy our imagination in the name of (brace yourselves, Muslims) Allah, so they break down the wall that separates the evil parts of our imagination from the good parts. The bad stuff invades, setting Santa Claus on fire and mutilating Ronald McDonald. I can’t even bring myself to tell you what happens to a poor Care Bear.
        South Park Imaginationland is about the way we let terrorism affect our hearts and minds. But it’s about so much more. It’s a devastating parody of the trigger-happy military, the self-aggrandizing politicians, the go-along media, fatuous Hollywood types, pompous hero tales like The Chronicles of Narnia — in short, everything in our culture. There’s also an overload of grotesquerie, but that just comes with the fourth-grade territory.
        How much do you want to bet that South Park Imaginationland is ultimately remembered as one of the great artistic works of the 2000s?

    Mad Men
    Sunday, 10 p.m. (AMC)
        Critics have gone wild over Mad Men, set in an ad agency during the early 1960s. But it’s left me cold, and the season premiere fails to raise the temperature. True, the series seems deep, with its dark palette, somber tone, slow pace and literary allusions. If the new episode quotes Frank O’Hara, it’s got to be important, right?
        Self-important is more like it. Mad Men has been talked about in the same breath as The Sopranos, but the comparison merely serves to point up its flaws. The Sopranos’characters leaped off the screen; Mad Men’s sink into the plush 1960s furniture. The Sopranos had energy, humor and momentum; Mad Men just sits there, content to fuss with its period details.
        Skinny ties, beehive hairdos, pink cars and mink stoles don’t create a world. I believe that’s a job for good writers, directors and actors.

    Jurassic Fight Club
    Tuesday, 9 p.m. (History Channel)
        It’s not easy to knock our socks off with another documentary about dinosaurs, but that doesn’t stop the History Channel. This new series takes the approach of a horror-movie trailer, with shock cuts and ominous narration.The first episode tries to spook us with a dinosaur unearthed in Madagascar, supposedly as terrifying as North America’s T-Rex. We hear of razor-sharp serrated teeth and a battering-ram horn. The narrator fairly shudders as he accuses this species of “the most gruesome acts in the animal kingdom.”
        But the facts, as they slowly emerge, make it hard to sustain the terrible tone. The dino’s name is Majungatholus, which is not easy to pronounce in a scary way. The History Channel is forced to admit that this “fearsome predator” had poor vision, short legs and unusually small arms. A digital re-creation even makes the battering-ram horn look silly, like an out-of-fashion hat.
        I wouldn’t be surprised if paleontologists soon discover that other reptiles snickered every time Majungatholus limped into view.
  •     Darius Rucker is hard to define. If you read his blogs, you’ll find him talking about everything from the latest historical mini-series on HBO to wrestling legend Dusty Rhodes. So, it isn’t surprising, that Rucker, who is better known as the lead singer of Hootie and Blowfish, is at the top of the charts again — oh, that would be the country charts. Like I said, he’s something of a contradiction.
        Rucker rose to fame in the early ’90s when the band had a series of hits, “Hold My Hand,” “Let Her Cry” and “Only Wanna Be With You” off their Cracked Rear View Mirror. The band, which formed at the University of South Carolina, was a pop-hybrid that took the music world by storm. In 1994, the band won two Grammy Awards — Best New Artist and Song of the Year for “Let Her Cry,” as well as awards from MTV, the People’s Choice and Billboard. {mosimage}
    In online interviews, Rucker said the band’s climb to fame was “dreamlike.” “I’d wished for it, but I’m not sure I believed it, even as it was happening.... The whole thing was kind of a blur.”
        What was even more of a blur for Rucker was the way the band found fame. Having been raised in a home where country music reigned, he had long dreamed of fronting a country band. As he notes on his Web site, “I believe what we do with Hootie is not that far off from a lot of country music. I mean, when we first started out, I begged the guys in Hootie to be a country band, and I just got outvoted.
        “And I have always written country songs — in fact, a big joke in the band is that I write these country songs that they have to make rock,” he added. “So for me, this is really just part of the natural evolution of my career — inevitable, really.”
        The evolution, to date, has spawned one new song “Don’t Think I Don’t Think About It.” The song has already climbed the country charts and has put Rucker directly in the country spotlight. Following a brief tour with Hootie this summer, he’ll hit the recording studio in the fall to complete his first full-length country album for Capitol Records. In the interim, he’s been spending some time watching some of his favorite country music performers perform. One performer who blew him away was Brad Paisley, and one performer he’d love to work with is Hank Williams Jr., having noted that it’s his dream to record “Family Tradition,” Williams’ signature song.
        “I’ve been in that little twangy rock cocoon for a while,” he said. “But now I get to come out and sing these songs. I plan to be doing this for a long time.”
        Rucker said fans of Hootie shouldn’t be surprised with his move to country. “I love music and for years I’ve listened to country artists. I mean, I grew up in South Carolina in the ’70s, you know. Some of my favorite memories of being a kid is sitting in front of an AM radio and flipping through stations. You would hear a Stevie Wonder song or something, then hear a commercial so you’d turn the dial . . . hear a Kiss song, hit another commercial so you’d turn the dial again . . . and then Buck Owens jumps out at you. His guitar has no bass and the high notes are higher than anything you think you have ever heard — I didn’t know who it was, but I listened to the deejay to find out. I just had to know.
        “I grew up with a mom that let me listen to whatever I wanted to, and a grandmother that loved country music, so it’s just naturally part of my background. It might sound funny now, but Hee Haw was a religion for me.  Every country artist that existed was on Hee Haw, and I saw ‘em all,” he noted in an online interview.
        So fans who loved Hootie, and there are many in Fayetteville, as evidenced by the turnout for the band’s performance at the Dogwood Festival, will not be disappointed in Rucker’s new direction.
        Having heard “Don’t Think I Don’t Think About It,” it’s not much of a leap from Hootie’s earlier music. Rucker’s distinctive voice does not take on a country whine, instead, it maintains that smooth, storytelling sound that launched the band in the first place. The lyric isn’t beer drinking, love ‘em and leave ‘em, and there’s nothing about trains, but Rucker has a definite country hit — you can catch IT on his Web site, DariusRucker.com or buy it via iTunes.


  •     Dear EarthTalk: I need to replace my old TV. Can you tell me which of the latest models is the greenest? I was told that the flat-screen/plasmas are real energy hogs. What do you recommend?
                                     — Angela Montague, via e-mail


        According to The Wall Street Journal’s Rebecca Smith, a 42-inch plasma TV set can draw more power than a large refrigerator, even if the TV is only used a few hours a day. This is partly because many newer models don’t turn off but go into “standby” mode so they can start up fast later with no warm-up period. “Powering a fancy TV and full-on entertainment system — with set-top boxes, game consoles, speakers, DVDs and digital video recorders — can add nearly $200 to a family’s annual energy bill,” she adds.
        Smith recommends green consumers consider the Liquid Crystal Display (LCD) models, which typically uses less energy than comparable plasma sets. According to the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), a 28-inch conventional cathode-ray tube (CRT) set uses about 100 watts of electricity. A 42-inch LCD set might consume twice that amount, while plasma could use five times as much, depending on the model and the programming. For the largest screen sizes (60 inches and up), projection TVs are the most energy efficient, clocking in at 150-200 watts — significantly less than the energy a plasma set would use.
        “What scares us is that prices for plasma sets are dropping so fast that people are saying, why get a 42-inch plasma set when you can get a 60-inch or 64-inch one,” says Tom Reddoch of the non-profit Electric Power Research Institute. “They have no idea how much electricity these things consume.”
        For its part, the industry is taking some steps to make its products more efficient, and to improve disclosure of energy usage. In June 2008 Sony pronounced its new 32-inch Bravia KDL-32JE1 LCD model “the world’s most energy efficient television.” Slated for sale in Japan in August 2008 for around $1,400, the new set utilizes fluorescent tubes to create higher levels of brightness with less energy consumption, but still delivers large resolution, a high contrast ratio and a wide viewing angle.
        Beginning in November 2008, forward-thinking manufacturers will get a little boost from the U.S. government, which will start awarding the most energy efficient new TV sets “Energy Star” labels to help consumers identify greener choices. TVs bearing the Energy Star label must operate at least 30 percent more efficiently than standard models in both stand-by and active modes. Consumers can see which models qualify by visiting the televisions section of the EnergyStar.gov home electronics page. According to the EPA, if all TVs sold in the U.S. met Energy Star requirements, yearly energy savings would top $1 billion and greenhouse gas emissions would drop by the equivalent of taking a million cars off the road.
        Of course, the greenest option of all (aside from getting out from in front of that tube and spending more time outdoors) is to keep or repair your existing CRT unit (a digital-to-analog converter will be needed after February 2009 when new signal specifications go into effect). Most CRT sets use less energy than any of the LCD or plasma models, and if it ain’t broke, why fix it? Buying a new TV, even a greener one, only generates more pollution in production and transport, and creates waste in junking the old model.
        CONTACTS: U.S. Environmental Protection Agency, www.epa.gov; Energy Star, www.energystar.gov; Electric Power Research Institute, www.epri.com; Sony Corp., www.sony.com.
        GOT AN ENVIRONMENTAL QUESTION? Send it to: EarthTalk, c/o E/The Environmental Magazine, P.O. Box 5098, Westport, CT 06881; submit it at: www.emagazine.com/earthtalk/thisweek/, or e-mail: earthtalk@emagazine.com. Read past columns at: www.emagazine.com/earthtalk/archives.php.{mosimage}
  •     Remember when our imperial overlords in Raleigh deigned to let us vote on state bond issues? Legislative leaders have apparently decided that the idea of building a consensus around public debt is passé, and that the state constitution is a vestigial reminder of a quaint past, like a long-forgotten hula-hoop in the corner of the garage.
        Just before Independence Day, House Speaker Joe Hackney and Senate leader Marc Basnight emerged from seclusion to inform us peons that they had struck a deal on a 2008-09 budget plan. Responding to warnings about faltering revenues, they agreed to reduce planned tax cuts from $50 million to $20 million. The $21.4 billion General Fund budget represents annual growth of just over 3 percent, which is admirably moderate.
        {mosimage}But then came the sock in the gut.
        In recent years, legislators have grown increasingly comfortable with issuing certificates of participation (COPs) to fund the construction of prisons and other public buildings, rather than using general-obligation bonds. Technically, COPs do not pledge the full faith and credit of the state, and thus are not thought to trigger the state constitution’s requirement that public debts be approved by a vote of the people. Instead, COPs essentially give bondholders a share of revenues to be derived from a particular project. Of course, bondholders know that governments aren’t going to neglect to fund prisons, schools and the like. So in practice, there’s not a lot of difference.
        There is a limited role for COPs in a fiscally conservative government — when speed is truly of the essence, for example, and the borrowed amounts are small. Neither case applies here. The House had included $550 million in COPs projects in its budget plan. That was excessive and unnecessary, because House leaders admitted that many of the projects wouldn’t break ground for years, giving them ample time to submit them to referendum. Then the Senate came along and proposed $672 million in non-voted debt. That was exorbitant and outrageous.
        Here’s how fiscal mathematics in Raleigh works. When given a choice between excessive and exorbitant, you don’t split the difference. You add. So now we are facing an extreme result: more than $1 billion in new debt, including $750 million in COPs, $107 million in reissued bonding authority, and more than $200 million in additional bonds slated for 2009 or 2010. The COPs will cost taxpayers millions more to finance than would bonds. And legislative leaders admit that many projects won’t be built immediately, invalidating any argument based on urgency.
        Realizing that cutting voters out of the fiscal equation isn’t a presentable policy in an election year, Basnight and Hackney resorted to the old politician’s trick of magically transforming a cost into a benefit. The new debts, they asserted, would create 20,000 jobs in construction and related industries, putting $85 million back into the state treasury in the favor of taxes and fees.
        And what of the private spending that the new budget will displace by jacking up annual debt service? The question doesn’t seem to have occurred to Basnight and Hackney, operating under the assumptions that borrowing is income and that opportunity cost doesn’t exist. Public debts for infrastructure are justified only if the benefits from using the infrastructure to carry out legitimate government functions — incapacitating criminals, for example — exceed the full cost of the debt, including principal and interest over the life of the loan. They are never justified by the apparent economic benefits of building the infrastructure, given that the economic benefits are simultaneously lost in the private sector when the state confiscates private incomes.
        Any worthwhile capital projects in the proposed 2008-09 budget compromise should be submitted to the voters. It would reduce borrowing costs and give the public its constitutional due. But would you and other North Carolinians be likely to approve $1 billion worth of new debts in tough economic times? Basnight and Hackney seem to think the answer might be no, which is why they have decided not to ask you.
    Constitutional government is such a bother sometimes.
  •     Who in North Carolina owes the most to the late Sen. Jesse Helms?{mosimage}
        The past few days since Helms’ death have given commentators the opportunity to review his career and the contributions to history.
        The emphasis has been on his contributions, and in accordance with our good tradition of not speaking ill of people right after they die, the discussion of any negative impact he made has been muted.
        Who then was the greatest beneficiary of Jesse Helms’ presence in North Carolina politics?
        If you are listening to what most people are saying, it is the North Carolina Republican Party that owes the most. As the first Republican senator to be elected from North Carolina in the 20th century, Helms’ groundbreaking victory in 1972, they say, opened the floodgates. Each of four reelection campaigns brought more voters into the Republican fold and brought about more political victories for other Republican candidates.
        Not just North Carolina, others say, he was a major national figure. Ronald Reagan and the “Reaganized” Republican Party would not have happened without Helms, who, they say, kept Reagan alive as a political figure by bringing about Reagan’s 1976 upset victory over Gerald Ford in the North Carolina presidential primary.
        Of course, you’ll hear that political and religious conservatives, without regard to political affiliation, owe him a lot, too. His vigorous and inspirational cheerleading certainly mobilized and strengthened their causes.
    We are hearing much more about Helms’ contributions along these lines.
        But I have an entirely different idea.
        What group owes the most to Sen. Helms? My answer: The North Carolina Democratic Party.
        I wonder if you will agree with me.
        I contend that if it had not been for Jesse Helms the Democratic Party might have lost its dominant position in state government during the time Helms was in office. Like other southern state Democratic parties in the mid-20th century, North Carolina Democrats were used to having a virtual monopoly on political power. They were accustomed to governing, but the historic lack of competition from Republicans had left them without the experience to meet competitive forces. Without the need to develop a strong unified platform or set of principles to hold it together, it had none.
        Meanwhile, in North Carolina and throughout the South during the latter part of the 20th Century, Republican strength surged. First, in national elections, the “solid South,” including North Carolina, became “solid” for Republican candidates. Then, gradually but steadily, Republicans began to win control of southern state governments as well. For instance, in South Carolina and Georgia, Republicans have won and retained control of the legislatures and the governors’ mansions. Also in Virginia, Republicans won solid control of the state legislature, which they kept until last year when the Democrats regained control of the state senate by a very small margin.
        Meanwhile, in North Carolina, Democrats resisted the regional trend.
        During the Helms Era (1972-2008) Democrats maintained control of the state senate and, except for a four-year period during the 1990s, kept control of the state house of representatives. And, except for 12 years under Governors Jim Holshouser and Jim Martin, only Democrats have lived in the governor’s mansion.
        Why were North Carolina Democrats able to hold on to power in state government when Democrats in adjoining states were losing it? What held North Carolina Democrats together, even when there was no shared positive (conservative or liberal) ideology to rally around?
    Jesse Helms.
        Democrats who might not agree on anything else could agree that they didn’t like the things “Jesse stood for” or they didn’t like the negative and mean-spirited way they thought he operated. For them and for others, Jesse Helms’ national image was an embarrassment to their state. Fighting Jesse held North Carolina Democrats together, motivated them to work harder, and drew new people into their ranks.
        So, who will miss Jesse Helms the most? You know what my answer is.
  •     Cape Fear Valley Health Systems is building a new patient tower. In fact, it is almost finished. Scheduled to open in September, the new tower will have a large emergency department, a children’s emergency department, the heart and vascular center, radiology and imaging, a women’s unit and 96 inpatient beds.
    And what does any of that have to do with 4th Friday?
        “They had a budget to put some art work in there,” said Margo Jarvis, director of marketing and development for the Arts Council of Fayetteville/Cumberland County. “So they pitched the Arts Council and we came up with this idea for a call for art.” 
        This is not the first time CFVHS has reached out to local artists — its Pavilion North on Ramsey Street also houses local works.                                                                                                                                         {mosimage}“They’re a really good arts’ steward in the community as a corporation, building these collections of art from local and regional artists,” said Jarvis.
        The theme for the exhibit is the brain child of William Avenel, vice president and chief information officer for CFVHS, also an artist who has contributed to the collection. “He wanted it to be original works from the artists,” said Jarvis. “He didn’t want it to have a health theme. He just wanted to see what the artists could come up with themselves, what they would create.” 
        The result is a wide assortment of media including acrylic, oil, fabric and photography.
        Because the new patient tower is such a large building, CFVHS wanted to send out the call to all artists in North Carolina and South Carolina who are 18 and older. And that is just what the Arts Council did.
    “We got nearly 250 pieces from 76 artists in 29 cities across the state,” said Jarvis. After it was juried by a juror from the arts committee, as well as a juror from the hospital, 44 of those works by 30 artists from 18 cities remained. Those 44 works will be on display this 4th Friday at the Fayetteville Arts Council, 301 Hay St.
        “I don’t think they (CFVHS) intend to buy all of them, but all of them are for sale,” she added.
        All of the pieces purchased by the hospital will be marked for their collection and the rest of the works are for sale and available to the public. Purchase awards will be announced at 8 p.m. There will be artists represented from all over the state, some as far away as Statesville and Wilmington.
        “It’s an exciting show and it is definitely a wonderful opportunity for the artists,” said Jarvis “I certainly commend Cape Fear Valley on their leadership and this initiative to use local artists and support that community.” 
        In addition to the art, the Arts Council will also host the Fayetteville Symphony Orchestra Quartet, that will provide great music as you look at the art.
        The fun starts Friday, July 25, at 7 p.m., with several venues downtown showcasing various artists and performers. {mosimage}

    4th Friday Venues 
        •AIT Realty — Karaoke by the Spin Doctor. Refreshments.
        •Cape Fear Studios — Silk Comes to Life, Cary artist Deborah Younglao’s silk paintings and art quilts through Aug. 20. Refreshments.
        •City Center Gallery and Books — Presentation by the Downtown Alliance of the winners of the Glory Days Field of Honor photography contest.
        •Cotton Exchange — Jazz ensemble, Spontaneous Combustion, with new local talent. Refreshments.
        •Cumberland County Headquarters Library — Teen Open Mic for comics, poets, rappers, karaoke all-stars and musicians. Help transform this humble stage into a forum of art, attitude and creativity. Register to participate by calling 483-7727 ext. 300.
        •Fascinate-U Children’s Museum — Children create their own masks. Free admission. Light refreshments.
        •Green Light Gallery — Tropical Living, a non-juried art show by The Fayetteville Art Guild. Show features art, food, music, dance and poetry. Festive atmosphere will include decorations and costumes from the Caribbean.
        •Market House — Scottish heritage exhibition, including Cape Fear Scottish Clans, Highland Dancers and bagpipes.
        •Rude Awakening will host photographer Jennifer Seaman and her work.
        •Sfl+a Architects — The art of Kelly Green, music by Jesse Janes. Refreshments.
        •White Trash — Hand scrimshawed bangle bracelets by Jessica Kagan Cushman.
  •      After some questions and concerns by citizens and city officials alike leading up to the start of {mosimage}Fayetteville’s new trash recycling service, the success of the first week of recycling may just cause other communities to become “green” with envy over the city’s 75-80 percent participation rate.
        “It’s just wonderful,” said Fayetteville City Councilman Charles Evans. “I’ll admit I had some problems with it at first, but I can now say I’m very pleased with the participation of the residents.”
        Fayetteville City Councilman Keith Bates Sr. echoed Evans’ excitement about the participation of the city’s residents in the nascent program; however, he said the huge number of folks filling their blue recycling bins also created problems.
        “We completely underestimated the amount of participation,” said Bates, “and we shouldn’t have put out the delivery carts so early; I know mine was full when they picked it up, and as soon as it was emptied I just about filled it up again.
        “We had several citizens complain that their container was not picked up,” said Bates. “I apologized and said we’d get to them as soon as possible. This is new to us and new to Waste Management. But I know they are working hard — they picked up mine at 8 p.m. the first week and at 5 p.m. the next week. They’re working extra hours to get it done.”
        In addition to the high participation rate, the city’s residents are also doing it right: Jackie Tuckey, Fayetteville’s public information officer, said the recycled waste was “very clean,” with just small amounts of non-recyclable garbage placed in the bins.
        Tuckey said 287 tons of material were collected in the first week.
        The recycling program began July 7 for single family dwellings — multifamily dwellings must take their recyclables to one of seven  recycling sites: College Lakes Park, Ann Street Landfill, Massey Hill Recreation Center, Fire Station No. 17, the Cliffdale location, Fire Station No. 9, and Honeycutt Park. These sites accept plastic containers, newspapers and magazines.
        The annual fee for the service is $42, which will appear on the property owner’s tax bill around August. The recycling bins will hold 35 gallons and recyclables don’t need to be sorted.
        The following recyclables may be placed in the bins:
        •Newsprint with inserts and magazines;
        •Brown, clear and green glass containers;
        •Aluminum beverage containers;
        •Steel cans and plastic bottles;
        •Corrugated cardboard; {mosimage}
        •Office paper and residential mixed paper (junk mail, catalogs and paper board such as cereal/food boxes).
        The following cannot be recycled: sheet glass, mirrors, ceramics, china, plastic bags or cellophane film, styrofoam, soggy or waxed paper/cardboard, petroleum product containers such as oil quarts or oil jugs, plastic toys.
        The city is also stressing that the recycling containers be placed at least four feet from the curb so the trucks will have room to pick up the receptacle and tip it into the truck.
        “The trucks are manned by one employee who drives and operates the lift mechanism,” said Tuckey. “So it’s important that there is enough room for the truck to operate.”
        The city also requests that residents remove products (food, drinks, etc.) from the recyclables and rinse once; labels do not need to be removed.
        As the recycling service entered its second week, Fayetteville City Councilman D.J. Haire gushed about the early success of the program, lauding his own neighborhood for its “green” attitude.
        “I live in the Broadwell subdivision and I’m so proud of my own community, as well as the whole of Fayetteville, which has really embraced this,” said Haire. “It feels good to see them rolling those blue containers out to the curb.”
        Haire did add that he would like to see the addition of service for those physically unable to roll their recycling cart to the curb.{mosimage}
        “Some of the people who are physically unable to roll out their trash cans to the curb, they are also unable to roll out the recycling container,” said Haire. “I’d like something to be done for those folks. Other than that it’s turned out to be excellent for the city and its residents.”
        For information about the recycling program or to find out the schedule for the pickup dates, call 433-1329, or check out the city’s Web site at www.cityoffayetteville.org.
  •     It’s rare that theaters get a chance to revisit a play — but when they do, the play rarely goes on stage the same way it was the first time. Such is the case with the Cape Fear Regional Theatre’s second go at Lunch at the Piccadilly.
        “It’s not exactly the same show. We’re not duplicating what we had before,” explained Steve Umberger, the director of the show. “When we did it the first time, it was brand new to the stage and we got a chance to shake out the wrinkles, but there’s more to be done.”
    One of the first things that needed to be done was downsizing the cast. The initial play had a fairly large cast — something that becomes a detriment in trying to get regional theaters to put it on stage. With this rendition, two characters have already been cut from the show, all in order to make the show more “produceable.”
        For Umberger, that’s been a dream in the making. Since directing the first show at the CFRT, he has worked tirelessly to get the show back to the stage. The brief run at the CFRT is designed to prepare the cast for a two week run at the Parkway Playhouse in Burnsville. Umberger said the connection with the audience during the first run was the driving force behind his work to bring it back to the stage.{mosimage}
        “There was so a strong connection with the audience,” he said. “This play touches people on so many different levels. Everybody has some stake in what the characters are going through.”
        The story revolves around a group of residents in a nursing home who decide to “change the world.” Their revolution beings with the teachings of Rev. Flowers, who thinks churches and nursing homes should become one, otherwise known as nurches, to meet the needs of society. When the residents take back control of their lives, hilarity ensues.
        “People get a kick out of the characters written by Clyde Edgerton (the author of the book, which spawned the play).” he continued. “They are so real. It’s a great snapshot of how people think and act.”
        Leading the talented cast is the CFRT’s Artistic Director Bo Thorp. These days, Thorp spends most of her time out of the spotlight, so it is a treat for audiences when she steps onstage  — especially for Umberger. “Bo is one of the first ladies of the theater,” he said. “For some people, theater is at the core of their being, she’s one of them. She’s been doing this 45 plus years, it’s who she is in her soul — it’s not just her life, it’s her reason for being. Directing her has been such a good time. We have a common vision of the play. It’s more fun for us this time around. There’s less angst and more fun.”
        For Patty Curco, a transplanted New Yorker, the revisiting of the play has given her the opportunity to reinvent her character. In the last staging, Curco was asked to come to a reading by Thorp. She thought it was a cold reading just for the director and showed up in casual clothes and no makeup. What she found was an audience. “I must be pretty good at cold readings, because I was asked to join the cast,” she said.
    For that staging, she played her role fairly straight. She adopted a southern accent and tried to blend in with the group. For this staging, she sees her character as a transplant much like herself. So she’s playing her that way. “Over the past two years, I’ve thought about her a lot, and thought, why would she have to be a native-born — why couldn’t she be a transplant?”
        Local audiences will have only three opportunities to see the show before it heads to the mountains. The play will open on Friday, July 25, and run through Sunday, July 27. Friday and Saturday night the show begins at 8:15. Tickets are $20. Sunday’s matinee begins at 2:15 p.m. Tickets are $15. Tickets can be purchased by calling the box office at 323-4233.
  •     Lights!{mosimage}
        Camera!
        Alayna!
        Alayna Credemore of Hope Mills is hoping to hit the big time and become a Hollywood starlet when she travels to California on Aug. 6 to compete in Hollywood’s Best New Talent Awards 2008.
    Credemore, 11, is a novice actress, so even if she doesn’t win the prestigious competition — which will give her a chance to perform before talent scouts and agents — she’s hoping the exposure will put her on the road to stardom.
        “I want to be an actress,” said Credemore. “I’ll do anything... commercials, comedy, TV series, movies... I just want to act.”
        Alayna was “discovered” about a month ago when she and her family visited her grandmother in New York. On a lark, Alayna’s family took her to visit One Source Talent, through which she was invited to several casting calls, including an audition for a Jell-O commercial. Though she didn’t get a callback from any of the casting calls, her involvement and her online photos and portfolio did catch the eye of Hollywood East Casting in Wilmington, which sent Alayna an e-mail stating she had been selected to participate in Hollywood’s Best New Talent Awards 2008.
        Alayna’s family expressed surprise not only that she was chosen to fly to L.A. to participate in the event, but that she was even interested in becoming an actress.
        “We’ve always called her a drama queen,” said Alayna’s father, who wished to remain anonymous because of his involvement with Special Forces. “When she did her performances in New York we saw a side of her that we had never seen. She’s usually very quiet and shy, but at the audition a lady asked her why she should pick Alayna over everyone else, and Alayna said, ‘Because I’m unique.’”
        Alayna, a student at Gray’s Creek Middle School, will compete in the acting category when she goes to California. She must perform a drama skit, a commercial and do print and runway sessions.
    Alayna rewrote a monologue provided online for the drama performance and a family friend helped her write the commercial skit.
        The competition will be at the Kodak Theater. Past winners include Brad Kish, who played the lead in the HBO series High School; Elizabeth Yozamp, who has booked national commercials and national radio, and is presently filming Step Brothers with Will Ferrel and John C. Reilly; and Adrianne Leon, an Emmy Award nominated actress who is best known for playing Brook Lynn Ashton on the soap opera General Hospital and played the role of Colleen Carlton on The Young and the Restless.
        It’s a win-win situation for Alayna, as she gets the chance to perform and be seen by movers and shakers from Disney, 20th Century Fox and MGM while also receiving tips from acting coaches, as well as participating in seminars such as runway modeling; acting techniques; managing her career; and finding out what record companies are looking for when signing a talent.
        “Even if she doesn’t win she’s getting exposure to all these people in the business,” said her father, “and it will give her an idea of what she needs to do to get into the business.”
        In addition to her training in Hollywood, Alayna is also getting a little homegrown tutelage as well.
    “When we watch television shows we tell her to pay attention to the actors and actresses because she might learn something,” said her father.
        And maybe someday we will all be paying attention to Alayna on the silver screen.
  •     A piece of the puzzle that makes up Fayetteville’s rich and varied history will be coming home July 22 through July 26 when perhaps the area’s most important historical artifact, the Liberty Point Resolves, goes on display at the Fayetteville Area Transportation Museum.                                                                                                                                {mosimage}The document — originally called the Cumberland Association, though popularly referred to as the Liberty Point Resolves — was written on June 20, 1775, and it declared the county’s independence from Great Britain as the colonies prepared for what became the American Revolution. The text of the document was copied by the locally famous Fayetteville patriot Robert Rowan while attending a meeting in Wilmington; he was the first of 55 men to sign this declaration of freedom, all of whom added their John Hancock around or near Liberty Point — the exact spot is unknown.
        The Resolves were penned a little more than a year before the Declaration of Independence; patriots in Charlotte wrote their own declaration about a month before the Resolves, but the Fayetteville document remains the oldest surviving declaration in North Carolina.
        After the war, the Resolves stayed with Rowan until his death when the document passed into the hands of  Rowan’s stepson, William Berry Grove. After changing hands a few more times, the document eventually became housed in the Southern Historical Collection at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.
        Bruce Dawes, Fayetteville’s historic properties manager, will drive to Chapel Hill and pick up the Resolves on July 21. It will be displayed at the Fayetteville Area  Transportation Museum inside a special case on loan from the Cumberland County Public Library designed to protect the fragile document. The display is being cosponsored by the Fayetteville Area Convention and Visitor’s Bureau.
        Dawes calls the document a “priceless” part of the area’s history. He says the Resolves and Rowan are intertwined in the accounts of that era — an era which saw Fayetteville become a vital cog in the struggle for independence.
    “Rowan, who has a street named after him in Fayetteville, is one of the great historical figures in our local history,” said Rowan. “Rowan was a member of the Sons of Liberty as early as 1710. He held a number of positions; even though he didn’t distinguish himself on the battlefield he was important in the logistics of the war, helping supply the army with clothing and other supplies.
        “During the war there was a salt supply near Cross Creek,” added Dawes. “Rowan earned the rank of colonel when he and a small band of volunteers fended off a mob of people who wanted to take the salt.”
        While Dawes said Rowan is remembered as one of the area’s great patriots, not everyone who signed the Resolves remained true to the cause. Dawes said two signers “switched sides” and joined the British cause after signing the declaration.
        “The revolution was very complex,” said Dawes. “At the time, it was a war against an established country that many here had strong ties to.”
        One of the signers who didn’t switch sides was William Herin; Herin’s great-great-great granddaughter, Fayetteville’s Gail Wilson, will be on hand at the opening ceremonies of the document’s presentation to help preserve the historical ties to her kin and the Resolves.
        “We’re very proud to be associated with it (the Resolves),” said Wilson. “We’re very excited, especially my two sons, who have told their friends all about it.”
        The grand opening ceremonies were held on Tuesday, July 22, at the Fayetteville Area Transportation Museum. Among those in attendance will be the local Marquis de Lafayette chapter of the Sons of the American Revolution, the Liberty Point Daughters of the Revolution and the Fayetteville Independent Light Infantry.
        Included in the wording of the Resolves is the following, powerful statement: “We therefore the subscribers of Cumberland County, holding ourselves bound by that most sacred of all obligations, that duty of all good citizens towards an injured country, and thoroughly convinced that under our distressed circumstances, we shall be justified before God and man in resisting force by force, do unite ourselves under every tie of religion and honour and associate as a band in her defense against every foe...”
        {mosimage}While the Resolves mention the need for force to wrest the country from the hands of the British, force shouldn’t pull you to the display at the museum — a sense of duty to our military heritage past and present should be enough.
        “This document represents Fayetteville’s history, especially the military aspect,” said Dawes. “Even before Fort Bragg, Fayetteville had chapter after chapter of involvement in helping protect this country. We are defined by the military. It is a special and important document for past and active members of the military, as well as their families, and for everyone in Fayetteville. This is a chance to see something they might never get another opportunity to see.”

  •     Doug Peters had his work cut out for him when he signed on as the new president and CEO of the Fayetteville-Cumberland County Chamber of Commerce. Just months before he made the move to Fayetteville, both the Fayetteville City Council and the Cumberland County Board of Commissioners were questioning how the money they were paying the organization was being spent. {mosimage}
        Peters heard and understands their concerns. That’s why as his first act as president of the newly renamed organization, he has implemented a 100-day strategic plan designed to bring greater accountability and a business mindset to the chamber.
        “All plans are a work in progress,” said Peters. “This plan is representative of where our priorities are currently, where we expect them to be as we move through my first 100 day tenure — which I hope is forever. I love Fayetteville.”
        Peters reiterated that he is a strategic thinker, and wants to make sure the organization is positioned well for the long-term.
        Already ongoing is a realignment of staff. He said the organization has some vacancies, and those responsibilities are being shifted to ensure that nothing falls through the cracks. “We are a people organization,” said Peters, explaining that much of the work of the organization is carried out by volunteers with staff guidance. “We want to make sure we have the right people in the right roles doing the right things for the right reasons.”
        The plan is also designed to build in accountability measures, create a set of values for the organization and create an environment that’s fun, yet productive.
        Key to the whole plan is improved communication throughout the community. During his first 100 days, Peters plans to meet with key leaders throughout the community to get their perspectives on the strengths, weaknesses and threats to the organization. He hopes to hear what it is they think the chamber should be doing. “We cannot be all things to all people,” he said.
        He added that he hopes to bring a transparency to the agency that has been missing. “I want the organization to do things as openly as it can. Obviously we can’t name names of companies who are looking at our area or give information that is not for public consumption, but we can meet with key individuals and share information and bring them to the table,” he said.
        In keeping with that idea, the organization will look at economic development losses to the community to find out why the county was not selected as a site for the new business. “The key is finding out why we were not selected,” he explained, “and then create strategies to strengthen these weaknesses.”{mosimage}
    Peters said the organization cannot keep doing business as usual. “We can’t keep doing activities because we’ve always done them,” he said. “We have to gain confidence in our ability to say no. We have to focus on key objectives. There are no sacred cows.”
        He will also start a benchmark process whereby the community will be compared to other communities of its size and demographic — the chamber will look at where we rank and what we, as a community, can do better. “We want to connect all the dots,” he said.
        Another benchmark he will look at is the satisfaction of the current membership of the chamber. “We’re going to ask them to rate us, and then create a report card with a baseline for improvement,” he said.
    Another set of partners he hopes to show improvement to is the organization’s funding partners. “We want to pull all of the foundational data together and then establish returns to measure progress and accountability for our funding partners,” he said. “We have to have accountability for our funding partners.         They have to know that there is a return on their investment. If we are not delivering value, then we are not getting the job done.”
  •     {mosimage}Remember the good old days when people believed the reason we invaded Iraq was to get cheap oil? How dumb was that? The White House and its happy band of neo-cons sure fooled us. I’ll admit to buying into the cheap oil theory. America was going to get Iraqi oil. We’d finally find out why our oil was buried under their sand. Gas would be too cheap to meter, like electricity from nuclear power plants was supposed to be. Noted geopolitics expert and gas station attendant Dr. Gomer Pyle says “Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!” Dr. Gomer reveals the real reason we invaded Iraq was not to get oil that was less expensive. We invaded Iraq to make oil more expensive.
        Who, you might ask, would want expensive oil? Do the names Exxon and BP strike a familiar note? The Olympic-sized level of cynicism required to figure out that invading Iraq was to create more expensive oil makes one marvel at the ability of the neo-cons to hoodoo their fellow gullible Americans. If there were a Nobel Prize for April fool jokes, the old switcheroo between invading for cheap oil morphing into invading for expensive oil would put Presidents W and Cheney in Stockholm next year to receive their prize from the King of Sweden.
        After the 9/11 attacks, America logically went after creeps in Afghanistan who planned and staged the attacks on America. It made perfect sense to try to kill the terrorists who killed 3,000 Americans. America once had the support of the world community in its fight against al Qaeda in Afghanistan. But there was a problem with confining the war to Afghanistan. Afghanistan has no oil. Running down and smoking out bin Laden wasn’t going to cause the price of oil to go up. There was no benefit for Big Oil with a war only in Afghanistan. Rummy and the neo-cons needed a war in a country with oil to drive up the price of gasoline. Voila, as the French would say: Invade Iraq and watch the price of oil soar. Afghanistan went to the back burner. Now, with the Iraq war front and center, we find the Taliban resurgent, the opium crops prospering and Pakistan crumbling. Gomer says “Oops.”
        Allow me to bore you briefly with some statistics. The day before we invaded Iraq in March 2003, the price of oil was about $37 a barrel. Now the price of oil is somewhere north of $140 a barrel. Halliburton’s stock price before the invasion was about $9 per share. Now it’s $46 a share. Oil company and Halliburton stocks were pretty groovy investments if you bought the day before the invasion. War is good for Big Oil and Halliburton.
        President W is a former oil man. President Cheney is a former Halliburton dude. Both of them have buddies in those industries. It’s only natural they would want to help out their compadres. If you can’t help your friends, who can you help? A war that quadruples the price of oil is a small price to pay if you exclude the costs in human life, injuries, materials and money. The Iraq War has been financed by the administration through sub prime loans from the Chinese. America may get foreclosed as a result. The balloon payment to Beijing won’t be due until W and Cheney are both safely out of office and making speeches for $50,000 a pop. Big Oil is making record profits as the lame ducks quacking away in the White House are making plans to give the oil industry one last door prize on their way to political oblivion.
        If you really wanted to increase the price of oil overnight to Mount Everest levels what would you do? Dr. Pyle suggests bombing Iran. The Iranians have been test-firing missiles that could reach Israel and American bases in the Middle East. They could shut down the Strait of Hormuz through which about 40 percent of the world’s oil chugs along in very slow moving target oil tankers. What a nice going away present for Big Oil to have the price of oil go to $400 a barrel overnight as a result of a new war with Iran as the Bush administration exits stage right.
        Gomer says fasten the seat belt on your bicycle. It’s going to be a bumpy flight.
  •     Years ago, before I was a wife, before I was a mother of three precious jewels, before I was an active participant in a family business, before I entered elective service, I was a member of the second class of trained counselors of a group of women and a handful of men who sought to address sexual assaults in Cumberland County.
        We were a small but committed band, and like many fledgling nonprofits and volunteer organizations, records were kept under members’ beds or in trunks of cars. Money was not much of an issue since we had none.
        Our entire focus was on providing assistance to the people who turned up in one local emergency room or another reporting a sexual assault.
        {mosimage}Like counselors of all sorts, we took calls and responded when “beeped” by an ER. We held hands with sexual assault victims as they underwent invasive medical exams, and we tried to provide support as they came to terms with their experiences, and in the rare instances they had to face their perpetrators in court we were there.
        I even testified in a case in which the sexual assault victim shot and killed the assailant, her live-in sweetie, an act for which she served prison time.
        The time for me to consider moving on came when taking calls became a burden for my young and growing family. What tipped me over the edge, though, were two different and unrelated 15-year-old sexual assault victims who seemed to feel that whatever had happened to them — and in both cases it was abnormal and criminal — was their lot in life.
        They were resigned, but I was stunned by their acceptances of what had happened to them and then angry about it.       
        I hope they got that way later.
        All of which has me thinking about the disappearances and deaths of young women and mothers, who were in so many ways just like millions of other young women and mothers throughout our country.
    The body of Meghan Touma was found decomposing in a Fayetteville hotel room.
        Holly Wimunc’s apartment was found smoldering by coworkers who came looking for her when she did not turn up at her job. Investigators located Holly’s physical remains in the remote North Carolina outpost of Sneads Ferry, not far from her estranged husband’s military assignment at Camp Lejeune.
        Her estranged husband has been charged in her death, and another soldier has been charged with helping to set fire to her apartment.
        And then there is Nancy Cooper, a woman with the same name as one of my longtime Fayetteville walking buddies.
        The Cary Nancy Cooper reportedly went for a jog on a recent Saturday morning, leaving her husband and two children at home. When she did not return as expected, a friend reported to law enforcement authorities that she was missing. Volunteers searched for her along her running paths, but several days later, their worst fears were realized. Cooper’s body was discovered near a planned residential subdivision.
    It is a wicked reality that strangers do sometimes assault and even kill other people, and that is a terrifying thought to all of us. News accounts of such crimes, solved and unsolved, grab our attention and haunt our thoughts.
        My experience as a sexual assault counselor and my longtime observations of news tell me, though, that such assaults and murders occur more often between people who know each other than between people who do not. Many times, those involved have formed the kinds of intense, even intimate, relationships that can generate strong, uncontrolled emotions.
        My experience as a human being has taught me that over time nature has equipped us mortals with inner sensors, a sort of early warning system. It kicks in when we encounter other people, and it allows us to feel comfortable in their presence or to be wary around them. We have all had this experience whether in our work place, at school or perhaps in a social setting. Some people we want to spend time with and others we can hardly get away from fast enough.
        During training for sexual assault counselors, we learned to trust our instincts. We learned that if a situation feels off-kilter in any way, it probably is. We learned that if you feel someone is even vaguely menacing or threatening, he or she may well be. We learned that if a situation feels uneasy to you, the best course is to get out of it as soon as possible.
        Over the years, several of the people I counseled told me they felt off balance during the time before they were attacked but most took no action. We have no way to know what the women who are now dead thought, but we may well hear what they said to others at some point.
        My advice to my own children and to all of us, women and men, is to pay attention to and follow our instincts about other people even if we do not fully understand them.
        Life can, indeed, be crazy scary.
  •     The tragedy of the deaths of Holly Wimunc and Megan Touma has left a hole in our community — and it should have. We are a community that prides itself on taking care of our soldiers, and two of them have died painful, needless deaths, and we couldn’t protect them.
        That same story is being played out across the United States. Women of all ages and walks of life are dying senseless, needless deaths, and it’s usually at the hands of someone they know — intimately. That only makes their deaths more horrific.
        Both of these women’s lives were, according to their friends, bright with promise. What they could have accomplished will remain a question mark, one left in rage.{mosimage}
        What their deaths have also brought to this community is a horde of media attention. People are putting our community under a microscope, picking it apart and trying to see where we’ve fallen down. We’ve fallen no further than any other community in our nation. One has only to pick up the newspaper or turn on the news and hear the same tragic story unfold … in communities in California, Illinois, Texas, Pennsylvania. Violence against women knows no boundaries.
        In our community, unfortunately, many people are trying to tie the women’s service in the military with their deaths — that isn’t the case. As one national media outlet questioned, “Is the Army training people to be killers?” In case they missed it, the two soldiers were the ones killed. That same media outlet questioned whether Fayetteville was tired of the violence caused by the military — again, the violence was done to members of the military — as is the case in the majority of crimes in our community.
        It’s bad enough when people who are not a part of our community come here for a couple of days and pass judgments on our community that are not based on fact. It’s worse when it comes from within.
        Recent headlines in the Fayetteville Observer have painted a bleak picture of our community. They have pandered to fear and have sensationalized the deaths of these two women. That’s disappointing. The Observeris a well-respected newspaper, one that should have our community’s interest at its center. But it’s a business as well, and fear sells.
        A recent article talked about the number of military wives living in fear — locking themselves in their homes. The Observerreporter talked to a couple of women, neither of whom wished to be named, who had nothing good to say about our community. I imagine these are women who reside here — they don’t live here.
        There’s a difference.
        People who reside here do it with a degree of snobbery. They make the trek from the mall to their apartments, from their apartments to Fort Bragg, and turn their nose up at our community. They don’t contribute anything while they are here, and as one woman noted, look longingly at the road out of town. It’s their loss.
        There are others who actually live here. They join churches and clubs. They go to community events, volunteer and have an impact on our community. They are the heart and soul of our community.
        They know that our community is more than a series of sensational headlines, they recognize the truth — that violence occurs in every community — and that it cannot define a community. A community has to be defined by the people who live in it — not those who just pass through.
  •     Have you ever seen a miracle? If not, strap on your boots and your helmet and head over to M & M Leather  and Custom Cycle on Saturday morning and take a ride. You’ll not only get to see a miracle, you’ll be part of making it happen.
        The annual Christmas in July Toy Run to Duke Children’s Hospital supports the Children’s Miracle Network, an international nonprofit organization dedicated to helping children by raising funds and awareness for 170 nonprofit hospitals throughout North America, serving more than 17 million children with all types of illnesses. Research funded by the Children’s Miracle Network helps give babies a chance for happier, healthier lives.
        The annual toy run has been a Fayetteville tradition for the past six years. Put together by Joe Cook and William Winford, associates at the Wal-Mart Logistics Distribution Center located in Hope Mills, the event has raised more than $6,000 in cash and toys since its start.
        For just $15 and a toy, you can be a part of the miracle. The registration money goes directly to the Children’s Miracle Network, while the toys go to the children’s hospital to meet the needs of its patients. The gifts are used to fund the hospital’s “treasure chest” for the children. Items needed include: rattles, stackable rings, lullaby tapes/CDs, stack and sort blocks, musical toys, Legos, playing cards, dinosaurs, trains, Barbie dolls, Playdoh, journals, craft kits, disposable cameras, door basketball goals, gift cards for the playroom.{mosimage}
        Pre-registration for the event will be held Friday, July 18 at Legends on Bragg Boulevard from 6-8 p.m. Once you register, stay around for the Kick-Start Party. If you can’t make it over to Legends, you can register Saturday, July 19 at M & M Leather from 7:30-9:50 a.m. While waiting for the ride to start, participants can purchase raffle tickets and take part in an auction.
        At 9:50 a.m., the Cumberland County Sheriff’s Department will give riders a safety brief prior to their departure. The ride will officially kick off at 10 a.m., with riders heading out Bragg Boulevard on their way to Durham.
    Riders are expected to arrive at Duke University Children’s Hospital at noon, where they can enjoy a great lunch provided by Texas Roadhouse. At 1 p.m., the money and gifts will be presented to the hospital in a special ceremony that involves the families whose children are being treated at Duke. At 1:30 p.m., riders can head back down the road to Fayetteville.
        This year, as in past years, a cookout will be held at M&M Leather. There will be a 50/50 drawing, as well as drawings for various gifts and prizes. In addition to the great fun and prizes, there will also be some awesome entertainment, featuring Gasoline, Wicked Lizard and DD Productions.
        Corporate partners include: Double D Productions, JEB Designs, Legends, M&M Leather, Up & Coming Weekly, Texas Roadhouse, The Custom Edge, Inc. Wal-Mart Logistics TO 6840 and DC 6040 and Arctic Fox Video Production.
  • Date My Ex wallows in perversity
        Date My Ex: Jo & Slade
    (Monday, 10 p.m., Bravo) has a wafer-thin premise: Jo De La Rosa from The Real Housewives of Orange County is set up on dates by her ex-fiance, Slade Smiley. As in any other dull dating series, guys go out with Jo and get eliminated one by one. But the producers seem to think that the ex-fiance angle adds limitless drama and intrigue. Everyone has been told to play up the “weirdness” of the scenario, despite the fact that it was obviously cooked up by Jo, Slade (now her manager), Bravo executives and all their lawyers in some Hollywood office.
        “I can’t believe I’m on a dating show with my ex-fiance!” Jo chirps unconvincingly. “It’s, like, definitely kind of weird!”
        “It’s a weird thing to think that other guys are thinking about my ex-fiancee that way,” says Slade, as if the idea had just dawned on him.
        You might not mind the contrivance if Jo were fun to hang out with. But she’s a giggling nitwit who affects a babyish voice and pout. Here’s a typical example of her wit and wisdom: “I was, like, whoa.”
        We are, like, ick.{mosimage}

    Family Foreman
    Wednesday, 10 p.m. (TV Land)
        I love George Foreman, the former world-champion boxer and current world-champion character. I’m reluctant to take a swing at his new reality series, but this thing deserves to be knocked cold. It’s another example of a celebrity turning the camera on himself and his family for no good reason.
        The premiere episode meanders from the kitchen table to the garage to a speedway where a Foreman-sponsored team will compete. George’s daughter has been tapped to sing “God Bless America” before the race, and he seems to think we care. But why would we care about someone so petulant, not to mention scatterbrained? “Are we in Indiana?” she asks while sitting in the middle of Chicago.
        No, dear, we’re in hell.

    High School Musical: Get the Picture
    Sunday, 8 p.m. (ABC)
        This reality series seeks stars for the upcoming High School Musical 3. Producers scour the nation for bright young talent, visiting local singing competitions and karaoke bars. A dozen finalists attend High School Musical Camp, where weekly eliminations winnow the field to the new Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens.
    But wait. The winners of High School Musical: Get in the Picture will not technically appear in  . They’ll merely appear in a music video that runs over the closing credits, when viewers have already gone to the bathroom or changed channels.
        So basically, ABC is asking us to spend several weeks on a virtually meaningless casting exercise. I suggest changing the series’ title to High School Musical: Afterthought.

    Generation Kill
    Sunday, 9 p.m. (HBO)
        This miniseries is based on Evan Wright’s book, which chronicles the first 40 days of the Iraq War. We follow a group of Marines who spearhead the invasion, all familiar types from modern war movies: raunchy, cynical, flawed. At the beginning of this week’s episode, they’re smug about the United States’ military might. “Yes, we are the conquering heroes!” one of them crows as tanks roll through the desert. Hmmm, do you think disillusionment and death might be just around the corner?
        Viewers will tune in not for the script, but for the production values. Generation Killwas filmed entirely in Africa, and it puts you right in the middle of a realistic war zone. The screen fills with explosions, gunfire, smoke, rubble, fire and very convincing corpses.

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