Grilley Mitchell is the president of the Cumberland County Veterans’ Council. He was still on active duty, stationed at Fort Lee, when he heard a woman stand up at a meeting and say that her husband had died in 1976 in Vietnam and nobody had ever reached out to her. They’d been present at the funeral and for the short time afterward, but those attentions faded. The wife was left to navigate widowhood and loneliness on her own. Her words struck a chord with Mitchell. He knew it wasn’t right and determined then and there that if he were ever in a position to do something about it, he would.
His first term as president of the CCVC came and went. When he became president again, he mentioned that he’d like to organize an event for widows and widowers to socialize for a few hours sometime.
On behalf of the CCVC, VFW Post 6018 SSG James Dennis will be hosting a Widows and Widowers Social from 2 p.m. to 6 p.m. on May 31 at 116 Chance St., Fayetteville. Everyone is welcome to attend. You do not need to be associated with the VFW or any other veteran organization, whether that organization is a member of the CCVC or not.
Of course, members of all veteran organizations, such as the American Legion, Disabled American Veterans or Combat Veterans Motorcycle Association, are encouraged to attend. However, attendees don’t have to be associated with the military in any capacity. This is a community-wide event. The dress code for this event is dressy casual.
There is no charge to attend, and guests will be served a delicious meal of chicken, beef stew, green beans, corn and assorted cakes and desserts. Everyone will receive a gift bag. A program of long speeches and somber tones are not on the agenda. A conscious decision was made to eliminate a formal program, not out of disrespect for the deceased, but to allow those who have lost a spouse to simply enjoy themselves for just a few hours. Aside from a short opening, the afternoon will be filled with conversation, enjoying a good meal, music and games.
Edward Beard is the VFW Commander for the entire state of North Carolina. He and Mitchell are both naturally outgoing and enthusiastic about the social. Beard understands that attendees might not be the socializing type. But with the chance to make new friends and to simply relax and have fun for a few hours, why not?
Mitchell shared a story where two veterans ended up discovering that they had served together in Vietnam. That was sixty-plus years after the war ended: a friendship rekindled.
The closer we all seem to be through technology, the farther apart we are in real life. Instead of staring at a screen, why not be in the presence of others, shake hands, maintain eye contact, and hold a conversation?
“Give us a shot,” Mitchell says.
The CCVC is a volunteer organization of veterans and veteran organizations. It serves as a united voice for local veterans, advocating for resources, awareness and recognition. The organization is responsible for the annual Veterans Day Parade in downtown Fayetteville every November.

(Photo: The VFW Post 6018, along with the Cumberland County Veterans Council, will host an event aimed at celebrating those who have lost loved ones. Photo by Erin C. Healy)