1973 is officially middle aged. Today we will take a walk down Memory Lane to 1973 which is celebrating its 50th birthday this year.

If you are of a demographic which can remember that far back, kindly do not drive at night. If you are too young to remember 1973, why are you reading this column? Hop on board Mr. Peabody’s Way Back Machine. It’s time to poke around in the dust bin of history into which 1973 has been deposited.

January: The year started with a bang in January with George Steinbrenner and some buddies buying the New York Yankees for $10 million. A million dollars went a lot farther in 1973.

The Watergate burglary trial started starring Judge “Maximum John” Sirica presiding. (For you youngsters who are still reading, Watergate was a quaint scandal involving a third-rate burglary that brought down President Nixon).

Elvis’ concert from Hawaii was broadcast on TV. Monty Python’s Flying Circus had its last broadcast on BBC.

OJ Simpson was the MVP of the NFL Pro Bowl. Mr. Simpson went on to beat two murder raps but got sent to prison for stealing his own sports memorabilia.

Roe v. Wade was handed down by the Supreme Court. It turned out that did not finalize abortion rights.

Nixon announced Peace with Honor had been achieved in the Vietnam war.

February: Hagar the Horrible appeared for the first time in the funnies to the delight of fans of viking humor everywhere.

The price of gold jumped $10 per ounce overnight to $95. Pretend you had bought $1000 worth of gold then. Sweet vision, ain’t it?

The Triple Crown winner Secretariat sold for $5.7 million or the price of 60,000 ounces of gold. Fun Fact — as of the writing of this column an ounce of gold sells for $1971 which means 60,000 ounces translates into $118, 261,000. That would buy a lot of hay.

March: Far Out! Pink Floyd released their album “Dark Side of the Moon” to the eternal enjoyment of aging hippies worldwide. Sales of pizza and patchouli oil shot through the roof.

John McCain, who had been otherwise engaged for the last five years at the Hanoi Hilton, was freed by North Vietnam.

White House Counsel John Dean tells Richard Nixon that Watergate is “a cancer growing on the Presidency.”

“The Godfather” wins the Academy Award for Best Picture.

April: John Lennon and Yoko Ono form a new country named Nutopia.

The first mobile phone call is made in America by Martin Cooper, the head of the Motorola communications division.
FBI Director L. Patrick Gray, caught up in Watergate, resigns after “twisting slowly, slowly in the wind.” Nixon’s Berlin Wall henchmen Bob Haldeman and John Erlichman resign.

May: Not much happened of interest.

June: “The Rocky Horror Show” opens as a play in London.

Marvin Gaye releases “Let’s Get It On” which wins R&B Song of the Year. Marvin’s dad later forfeits any claim to Father of the Year.

July: John Paul Getty III, grandson of one of the richest men in the world is kidnapped. Kidnappers send his ear to Granddad to push their ransom demand.

August: The movie “American Graffiti” premieres spiking nostalgia for the early 1960s.

Willie Mays hits his 660th and last home run.

September: Billie Jean King beats Bobby Riggs in the incredibly hyped tennis Battle of the Sexes.

October: Vice President Spiro Agnew resigns in disgrace pleading no contest to tax fraud. Gerald Ford is nominated to replace him.

Dolly Parton releases “Jolene.”

The Watergate Saturday Night Massacre fires Attorney General Elliot Richardson and Deputy AG William Rucklelhaus for refusing to fire Special Prosecutor Archibald Cox. This does not work out as well as Nixon hoped.

November: President Nixon announces: “I am not a crook.” Turns out he was.

December: Scary movie “The Exorcist” is released on the nation, prompting a run on demon possession cures.

OPEC raises the price of a barrel of oil from $5.12 to $11.65

There you have it. Our old friend 1973 was full of life, bumps and bruises. If you can remember these things, be sure to take your meds before you go to bed this afternoon. If this seems to be ancient history, go back to doom scrolling Tik Tok.

Editor's note: To read about some things that happened 100 years ago, stay on board Mr. Peabody’s Way Back Machine and travel on over to page 9.